


Butterflies

by wonderfulmax90



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Other, mentions of abuse, mentions of self harm, mentions to suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-12 20:15:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28516278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wonderfulmax90/pseuds/wonderfulmax90
Summary: Was it your skin that was cold or was it your warmth that made him realize how cool his blood ran?Loki has a secret lover in you. A lover he wants to keep hidden from the rest of the Avengers. All he knows is that his heart has been tied to yours. When his secret comes to light through no fault of his own, he must keep his promise to you one way or another. Even if that means that you have to come to him.
Relationships: Loki (Marvel)/Reader
Kudos: 42





	Butterflies

The night sky was as beautiful as any other night. Each night grew more and more beautiful than the last. Each night that he got to live was a miracle. The night sky was beautiful out in the middle of nowhere. No lights to pollute the stars and moon above him. All of it was so bright that it negated the need for him to have a flashlight. But the trees above him dulled the light just enough that he couldn’t see as well as he could in the fields that surrounded almost every side of the cabin.

It was nice out here. Owls screeched high above his head. Their glowing yellow eyes watched every move he made his way through the entanglement of undergrowth. Loki had no idea why he made his way through the forest at night. Maybe it was calming or maybe he wanted to get lost and never be found again. The flashlight heavy against his palm with each sway of his body. The rest of his body didn’t ache even though it had been at least half an hour since he left the cabin.

He had no idea what he was looking for in the forest. It wasn’t exactly solace. What he was looking lay somewhere between clarity and solace. The air never felt cold against his skin. Nothing ever did. All he could feel was heat. Anything that could hurt him was always hot. Even then his blood still ran cold every time he heard a branch snap somewhere off in the distance. Still scared of what might be lurking in the shadows.

Loki found a decent tree and sat down on the ground. The flashlight fell to his lap as he pulled himself into a more comfortable position at the base near the roots. His eyes finally adjusted to the dark as he pulled out a piece of bread stolen from the kitchen out of his pocket. Clint would have his head if he found out that he took his sourdough bread. The air settled down around the god as he lifted his head towards the sky. The stars too numerous to count but he could at least try.

“Good evening, my prince.” Your ethereal voice landed on Loki’s ears. His eyes drifted away from the stars in the sky down to your shadow amongst the trees. “I wasn’t expecting you here tonight.”

“I wasn’t expecting you here tonight.” Loki stood on his feet, discarding the piece of bread on the forest floor next to him. “Why are you here?”

“I needed to escape.” Your shadow drifted closer to Loki. Close enough for him to make out your features a much better. The moon highlighting everything he loved about you and everything he hated about the house you lived in.

“I can see that much,” Loki lifted his hand up to your cheek. You pulled away just a bit. Long enough to send a wave of sadness through the god. You still didn’t trust him enough to not hurt him. When you finally let him touch your cheek, all he did was wipe a bit of dried blood away. A wince left your mouth as if you were afraid of what his hand might do even though he had never touched you out of hate before. Or maybe he was overthinking and it was just out of pain. “What did they do this time?”

“Nothing,” You let out a shaky breath. “They just came home in a mood from work already and I guess I didn’t do the dishes well enough.”

“They did something, my love.” Loki inspected the rest of your body with feather light hands in case he touched any fresh wounds. “Look at you, these are all fresh.”

“I’m fine Loki.” He backed away from the shock of his name leaving your lips. Never had you used his name on him unless you were truly angry with him and even then your words were chosen so carefully that it was like you were walking through a field full of landmines. “I just needed to calm down. I wasn’t expecting to find you out here anyways.”

“I wasn’t expecting to find you out here either. I just…” Loki felt a weight lift off of his chest. “I just felt this pull to come out here.”

“I-I did too.” You confessed to the god.

Loki had heard of these kinds of things before. He had heard it called the Love String before. Tied to the hearts of soulmates. The more they needed you, the more the string pulled on your heart. He was less inclined to call it that. He liked to think that he had his own destiny but every time you needed him, his heart seemed to lead him to the right place. Right where you needed him.

You wrapped your arms around the god. You were a good few inches shorter than him which made your hugs feel so much better. Your nose cold against his neck but your breath warm. Loki wrapped his arms around you much tighter then before but not tight enough to harm you. The bruises on your back from your last mistake were barely a week old. Your tears from that night had barely even dried.

“Do you want me to take you back to the cabin?” Loki pulled away from you just enough to look into your eyes. For a second, he thought he spied a hint of a smile on your face before it returned to the frown you always carried. “Maybe you can stay the night?”

“I should really get back.” Your eyes turned down to the leaves beneath your feet. “I don’t want him to get even more mad at me. I’ve already been out long enough, my king.”

Loki’s heart fluttered for a moment at the nickname but the weight of your words made it ache longer than the fluttering, “Yes, I don’t want another scar on that pretty little face. One day we will get you out of there. I promise you that.”

“Promise?” Your voice filled with hope as you looked up into his eyes. “How do I know you will keep it?”

Loki stood in silence for a moment. His word was normally enough but even that didn’t seem to be worth much anymore considering all that he had done to the world. His hands drifted over your wrists. So small between his hands. What could he give you that would prove his worth to you? There was nothing he could give to you that would prove to you that he would come back and help you out with leaving your godawful partner.

Loki’s spell was a whisper on the wind as his thumb rubbed over your delicate skin. A small butterfly appeared on your right wrist. One that only he and you could see. That much he knew. Your eyes brightened as the wings on the butterfly fluttered and flew up your arms to your half exposed shoulder. Your tank tops barely covered your shoulders no matter how cold it was. The more access they had to your skin, the better.

“This will only leave your skin once I have fulfilled my promise.” Loki lifted his sleeve up to reveal his own butterfly. “It will burn my skin off if I do not.”

“What if they see it?” You pulled away from Loki’s grip. Your fingers ran over the butterfly that sat on your shoulder. Its wings seemed to lift off your skin and into the air.

“They will not see it. I promise you that too. They won’t see the butterfly as long as I am a god.” Loki took your hand and lifted it up to his lips. Was it your skin that was cold or was it your warmth that made him realize how cool his blood ran? “My word is my bond.”

You lifted yourself up onto your tiptoes and placed a soft kiss on his cheek. “I promise that I shall see you again.”

You turned your back on the god and all he could do was watch you walk away. An ache creeped up from his stomach and into his heart. Every time you left the ache got worse and worse. This time was no different. It was like you ripped his heart out of his chest when you walked away. His knees shook as he tried to hold himself in an upright and steady position. He could only bare to take a few steps forward in a vain attempt to pull you back to him before he fell to his knees. Tears stroked down his cheeks as he watched your shadow disappear in the direction of the lights coming from the other cabin.

The light from the sun broke through the trees. Tears still stained the god’s cheeks as he readied himself to go back to the Avenger’s cabin. He wiped any remaining tears from his face as he picked up the now dead flashlight up off of the ground and headed back towards the edge of the forest. The sun still rising behind him by the time he made it to the door.

“Where have you been?” Natasha shut the door behind Loki as he kicked his shoes off in the foyer. “You missed your morning check-in.”

Loki let out a sigh as he looked over towards the woman standing between him and a good breakfast. Her arms crossed in front of her chest. Her eyes drove daggers into him as she inspected his clothing for any marks. She reached out a hand and made a grabbing motion. Loki shrugged off his jacket and hung it up on the open hook next to his brother’s.

“Come on, give it over.” Natasha made another grabbing motion as she looked down at the flashlight in his hands.

“Hand over what?” Loki toyed with her. The twist of anger in her face was enough satisfaction for the morning. Loki placed the flashlight in her hands with a laugh. “Just joking with you. Can I please go get some breakfast now? I’m starving.”

“Not until you answer to where you were all night.” Natasha stood firm in the middle of the doorway. If Loki wasn’t so nice, he would’ve picked her up by the waist and moved her out of the way. “Now, where were you?”

“I was all the way in the forest, I wanted to get a few things off of my chest before I returned to this prison.”

“Like what?” Natasha still didn’t budge from her spot. Her chest heaved with anger. “What was so important that you had to disappear for six hours?”

“My-” Loki paused. Any word of your whereabouts would mean that he could be breaking your promise to you. “I was looking at the stars.”

“Oh you were?” Natasha looked the god up and down before she stepped aside. “Fine…I’ll take your word for it just this once.”

Loki pushed past the former spy and walked to the kitchen. The smell of pancakes and bacon lead him straight to his spot at the island next to his brother who seemed to have already crushed a plate of pancakes. A smile appeared on his face as Loki brother settled into his seat. A heavy hand landing on Loki’s shoulder in a vague attempt at a greeting. Steve stood up at the stove finishing off the last of the pancakes before handing them to Loki.

“Someone was out late last night.” Steve commented as he turned back to start cleaning up.

“What about it?” Loki dug into the pancakes handed to him. They were some of the best pancakes that he had ever had. They just melted in his mouth with just a bit of syrup and butter. The bacon snapped and grumbled to pieces in his hands.

“Well you missed morning check in.”

“And what about that? I’m no longer a prisoner.” Loki wiped his mouth of any syrup that he had neglected to lick off of his lips. “I don’t need to check in with you.”

“It’s part of your parole, Loki. For the next few years.” Steve placed the last of the dishes into the dishwasher and turned back towards the rest of the team. His back straightened as if someone had pulled a string. “You are still under the eye of SHEILD.”

Loki groaned at the thought and continued to push the last of his food around on his plate. His stomach growled for something more than mere mortal food. His hand pushed away his plate without a second thought. His eyes drifted to his brother still. The only thing they truly shared was their eye color. The same striking blue that made him look so evil was the same blue that made his eyes look just a heroic. Loki stood from his spot at the island.

“Now if you’ll excuse me, I would like some time alone.” Loki turned on his heel and walked up the stairs towards the third floor.

His bed didn’t feel warm when he laid back down onto it. It never did after he left you to go back to that wretched person who treated you like a punching bag. His heart sank back into the mattress as he tried to make sense of why he left you go back to your cabin. He shouldn’t have left you there but you had nothing of your life with you that night. You had family photos and books that couldn’t be replaced in that cabin. Things you would need with you if you were to make your escape. Things your partner would surely destroy if you left them there.

Just one night. That’s all he needed to get you out of there. Just long enough for you to grab everything you needed and just run. The butterfly on his wrist fluttered against his skin. His eyes drawn to the small creature that he had chosen to be the symbol of his promise. From his own readings, it was supposed to be a symbol of romance and renewal mainly. But to him, it was one of your favorite things that roamed the forest you had met in. You only had eyes for him and the butterflies. Sometimes your eyes kept to the butterflies more than him. Not like it mattered. He only wanted to see you happy.

Your figure spun around in circles as your eyes chased the monarch that flew high above you. A wide smile graced your cheeks. The sun broke through the trees and lit you in a way that only made you look more beautiful than before. You turned back to Loki. Your eyes shone in the early morning light. No bruises graced your skin. No scars or marks to be seen. Your skin was perfect.

“I love the butterflies here. But they always leave too soon.” You seemed to float above the forest floor as you made your way towards the god.

“Winter always comes too quick,” Loki placed a hand on your cheek. You barely even hesitated at the gesture. “Which means we can’t see each other much anymore.”

“What? Are you afraid of a bit of cold?”

I’m afraid of what you might see if we go out in the cold. “No, I just don’t want you to freeze off that pretty little smile of yours.”

“You find a lot of things about me pretty,” You turned from him and back towards the butterfly that hovered near you. You extended a hand out underneath the butterfly. “Why is that?”

“Because you are very attractive. I can’t point out how beautiful you look to me?”

Loki kept his movements slow and steady as he moved up behind you. The butterfly didn’t even move. Not a single moment’s hesitation as the over worldly creature made its way towards the more earthly creatures. He wrapped his arms around you. The butterfly hovered over your hand for a few seconds before landing on a finger.

“Of course you can,” You turned with the butterfly still on your finger. “Just not used to it that’s all.”

Loki took your other hand in his and lifted it to his lips. A shiver ran up your arm. Your eyes darted over to his. “I know. I run a bit cold. I’m sorry about that.”

“Most people I know run a bit cold.” You smiled at him. “It’s perfectly fine.”

“Loki,” Natasha burst into his room with little more than another thought and set herself on the edge of the bed. “Are you going to tell me the real reason why you were out in the woods all of last night? Or are you going to keep that to yourself?”

“I told you that I was looking at the stars. I did little else out there.”

The lying felt good to Loki. It had always felt good to him but lying to the face of someone who had previously got him wrapped around their little finger felt so much better. She didn’t seem to see the cracks in his story just yet. Just a bit curious as to his why he would leave them in the middle of the night. Not like it bothered him for others to know where he met the love of his life. As long as your whereabouts weren’t revealed to anyone but him.

“You know,” She straightened out the wrinkles in the sheets. “The woods aren’t the best place to look at the stars.”

“I know. But the ones you do see in there look so much better in the woods.” Loki smiled. “Are you concerned for me? That I might be losing it in isolation?”

“I’m concerned only because I have to be concerned. If it weren’t for the fact that we’re all technically your parole officers then I wouldn’t care.”

“I know you wouldn’t which is why I am not sure why you are so into interrogating me.” Loki sat up in his seat as he looked over the woman who was sitting in his room and invading his space. “I was there looking at the stars. End of story.”

Natasha stood form her spot at the foot of the god’s bed. Her eyes still filled with suspicion as she looked over the room for anything else that might have been suspicious before she left the room. The door hadn’t been closed when she came into the room but she still took the time to close the door on the way out. At least that was nice. He got less than the bare minimum from everyone else. Loki stood up from his spot on his bed and crossed the room towards the window that faced the lake.

You rarely ever saw the lake. The Avengers cabin made sure of that. Even if you could see it, it would be a mere spot in the distance. The cabin you lived in was too far pushed back. But Loki was sure that you would love the view from his room. You would be perfectly protected in this cabin. A cabin filled with superheroes would be safer than sending you somewhere else. Somewhere far away from him. Somewhere where he couldn’t see you anymore. At least, this was the safest place for you to stay in his eyes.

“It was someone you love.” Loki turned towards the voice. Steve leaned his body against the doorway. “You went into the forest to see someone you love.”

“I-” Loki struggled to find the right words on his silver tongue to get him out of this situation but struggled to find any in the lovesick mush that was his brain.

“No use in lying to me. I know a lovelorn look when I see one.” Steve lifted his eyes from his job at picking the skin off of his fingers. “Who’s the lucky lady? Or man? Person?”

“Can you keep a secret?”

“I’m not really the kind for keeping secrets. That’s usually Natasha’s thing.” Steve let out a half hearted chuckle. “But I think I could try. As long as it’s not a secret that could destroy the entire world. Then I might have to tell someone.”

Steve walked into the god’s room. His fingers dusted the top of the child sized dresser as he inspected the same room Natasha did only a few moments earlier. White walls, a small wooden dresser, a small desk that could only hold a child and a chair just as well and a twin bed so small that his feet seemed to hang off of the edge. A prison cell.

“Then I won’t tell you anything.” Loki turned back to the window facing the lake. He couldn’t risk your position to anyone but himself right now. “Nice view isn’t it?”

“It is a lovely view.” Steve walked up to meet Loki at the window to look down at the same view Loki got every morning minus the beautiful sunset. “I wish my room didn’t face the creepy forest.”

“The forest can be a wonderful place to be whenever you need your head cleared.” Loki scanned the face of the patriotic hero. “I can hear the screams from your nightmares from all the way up here.”

“Maybe you could show me one of your favorite spots sometime.”

~

Loki lay back in his bed. His knees folded up against his chest in fetal position. The bed still as cold as the blood that ran through his veins. No one to warm the bed that so desperately needed another. Every night without you the bed only got colder. Not that you were ever in his bed in the first place but he had imagined you right next to him every once in awhile to keep his mind occupied. He wasn’t going to try to imagine you next to him right now. His heart still ached to see you just one more time.

Two nights out in a row normally meant that the next time he saw you there would be more scars on your body than he cared to count. Whoever was hurting you had a lot of time on their hands when they got home. Enough time that you were covered in scars in the days between when you first met Loki and the next time you saw each other. But Loki could risk it if you could both swing an escape plan tonight.

The string on his heart tugged. Softer than the first time he felt it. Loki shoved his thoughts down and turned over on his side towards the window. He couldn’t risk it. Everyone was already on edge from his night out last night. He would have eyes on him from the moment he left the house. His heart jerked back into his ribcage. Or at least it felt like it. Loki’s hand touched the area where his heart was underneath layers of skin and muscle and bone. His heart raced from the sudden jerk or motion.

“Alright, alright.” Loki stood from his spot in the bed. His feet light on the ground as he maneuvered through the clothing he left on the ground. “I’ll come to you, my love.”

Loki descended the steps down to the front door. No lights on but he never knew who was lurking in the shadows. His hand warmed with the glow of his magic. Just soft enough to see a few inches in each direction. Loki slipped his shoes and grabbed a set of keys off of the hook. His free hand waved over the security system which disabled it long enough for Loki to slip out of the cabin and into the field in front of him. He turned to his left and towards the woods. His eyes drawing back to the dark cabin to make sure no shadows stood in the windows.

His heart lead the way this time. His body weaved through the trees and undergrowth. No longer did he need his hand to light the way. His heart let the way. No light was needed for him. His eyes had barely adjusted to the light by the time he saw your figure in between two trees that kissed leaves in the canopy. You once again seemed to float above the undergrowth as you made your way towards the god.

"You called for me, my love.” You placed a hand on his cheek. The moon highlighting the healing wounds inflected on you the night before. “You couldn’t stand to go a day without me?”

“I think you were the one who called to me.” Loki held your hand flush to his cheek for a moment before he brought it down to his lips and placed a kiss on your palm. A feather light touch but it sent a shockwave through him and the best kind. “My love, you know how dangerous it is for the both of us to meet again so soon. They could easily hurt you worse than the last time we did this. You could end up dead.”

“I know, but I couldn’t let your bed go cold for another night.” You pulled away from his grip and walked back to the trees you appeared from.

“So this is where you have been traveling off to late at night.”

Loki whipped around towards the voice but got a fateful of flashlight instead. He lifted a hand to shield his eyes but that did nothing to show him who the person holding it was. From the voice it was more than likely that it was Natasha. It was the only voice he knew would come from that way that was that high pitched. Loki let out an angry growl and turned back to you.

You face hit with the remaining light of the flashlight. His shadow covered most of you but your face was covered in fear. The duffle bag you held shook violently. In fact, your entire body shook like the leaves in the wind above you. Your eyes wide like a deer in headlights. Your body frozen-for the most part-like one too.

“Who is this?” Your voice just as shaky as your body. “We promised we would never bring anyone else in here.”

“My love,” Loki shot a look back at Natasha now with a gun pointed at your head. “She followed me from my cabin. She wasn’t supposed to follow me in here. I would never break our promise, you know that better than anyone else.”

“Who are you?” Natasha’s voice was cold and calculating. Her eyes scanned you though there was little chance that she would find any kind of weapon on you. You stayed silent though but Natasha’s voice turned cold. “Answer the question or I shoot.”

You dropped to your knees in front of the two of them. You dropped your bag before you placed hands behind your head. A position that Loki only wished you would get into more willingly. “My name is Y/N L/N. I’m from the cabin right behind you. Please don’t shoot.”

“What is your relation to Loki?” Natasha continued. “Same rules apply. Answer quickly and truthfully and I won’t shoot you.”

“Why would you shoot me?” You answered. “I am an innocent civilian. I have nothing against you or Loki. Please just put the gun down.”

“For all I know you’re helping out an intergalactic criminal. Any information that you might have could place our world and any other world in our universe.”

“Natasha please,” Loki placed his hands on her gun and turned it towards himself. Away from you. “I never told Y/N anything. Can’t you see how freaked out they are? Would they be this freaked out if I told them anything about my past crimes?”

“What are you two talking about?” You stood from your spot on the ground. Your knees now covered in dirt. Loki turned towards you with tears in his eyes. Your eyes just had a similar amount of tears in your eyes. “What are you talking about?”

“He didn’t tell you that he’s the most dangerous god in the galaxy? About the hundreds of people he killed in New York? The other lives he threatened on Asgard? He killed people, Y/N. What makes you think he won’t kill you if he felt threatened enough?”

A tear dropped down your cheek as you looked Loki over. Your brows furrowed with confusion as Natasha still held a gun to Loki’s back. “Please tell me that isn’t true, my love.”

“Like you don’t watch TV.” Natasha shot at you. “You knew all about his crimes long before you met him in the woods. Unless he wiped your mind?”

“He didn’t wipe my mind.” You shook. “Trust me. But we’re in the middle of nowhere. The signal wasn’t strong enough to hold a phone call much less a TV until you all got here.”

“So you’re claiming small town ignorance on why you don’t know who he is?” Natasha pushed the gun into Loki’s chest even further. The barrel cool even through his own clothing.

“Yes, yes I am.” You looked over to Loki. More tears dropped down your cheeks and onto your shirt. “Please, Loki. Please tell me this isn’t true.”

“I can’t lie to you my love.” Loki sighed as he wring his hands together. Natasha’s gun pressing into his back even harder than before.

“Like you haven’t already lied to me enough as it is!” You screamed back at Loki. Your voice raw with tears and emotion. “You’re just as bad as them! Actually, you’re worse than him.”

“You know I would never intentionally try to hurt you.” Loki took a step towards you and you took a step back to keep the distance between you two. “I just want you to get to know the real me.”

“The real you is apparently a war criminal.” You fought back. “The ‘real you’ is a murderer! We’re supposed to be partners. We’re supposed to trust each other. How can I trust you when the you I do know is a fucking lie?”

“My love,” Loki reached out towards you once more. Your eyes darting down to his hand. For once, your body shook at the mere mention of a touch from him. “I don’t know what to say.”

“You can’t say anything that will fix this. And you know what Loki? We’re done.”

You picked up your duffle back and sprinted back into the arms of the person who had hurt you so many times before. Your own questions still hung in the air. Loki turned back to Natasha. His heart shattered into pieces with each step he heard you take away from him. Your footfalls echoing off of the trees until they were too faint for a mere mortal to hear. Tears rolling down his cheeks as he looked at her. Her eyes dragged over Loki as she grabbed his elbow and dragged him back towards the tree line.

“What the fuck were you thinking?” Natasha chastised. “You were supposed to be keeping a low profile. No contact with any civilians for the duration of your parole and even then you need a psych eval just so we know you won’t hurt anyone again.”

“It’s not like I can control the fact that I love them.” Loki explained. “My heart calls to them every single moment I am away from them. I can’t explain it to someone like you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Natasha dropped Loki off at the front door and extended her hand once more.

Loki dug in his pocket for the key and handed them to Natasha. “That none of you will ever know the love between a god and their soulmate.”

“So now you think they’re your soulmate?” Natasha unlocked the door to the cabin and pushed Loki in. “What a nice way to protect them. You risked everything for them.”

“And I would do it all again if it meant ever seeing them again.”

Natasha forced Loki to the stairs. His shins pressing into the wood behind him. Natasha loomed over the god. His eyes dropped to his muddy shoes. His eyes inspecting every single speck that clung to the sneakers he had gotten when he was confined to this prison. No laces otherwise he could use it to hang himself but he had enough access to other things if he could never see you again. It was the only way to break the tie between the two of you if he wasn’t. Then a new string would be tied yo you heart and you would be able to live a life free of him.

“You are on lockdown from this moment forward pending a decision made by the rest of the Avengers and Fury. You will not be able to leave your room. Your meals will be delivered to you. Your door and window will be padlocked shut all except for one hour a day where you will be supervised. Now get upstairs.”

Loki didn’t even have a chance to respond before he was pushed up the stairs. His feet dragged as Natasha knocked on everyone’s door, taking him on a tour of the house. She didn’t wait for them to open their door before she moved on to the next one. But the grunts and groans that Loki heard behind him was enough to tell him that they were all awake.

Natasha checked the room. Most everything had been tossed for anything that Loki could use to off himself. His clothes scattered the floor. A pen, a pencil and some razors had already been thrown into a plastic bag that Natasha carried. Thor held Loki back with just his strength alone. His chin resting on his brother’s shoulder as if that would calm the silent teats that fell from his eyes.

“Please,” Loki pleaded. “There’s nothing else. Just let me go to bed.”

Natasha flipped the bed back over and waltzed back over to the two gods. Her eyes once again digging daggers into Loki’s skin. “A monster like you can’t ever sleep.”

Natasha pushed past the two brothers and into the hallway. A key in her free hand as Thor pushed his brother into his prison cell. The door slammed shut behind him. The door lock clicked shut. Then another lock clicked shut. The padlock on his window had been locked at least half an hour beforehand. Large and metal like they padlocks they would put on that fence in Paris. The lake was clam this time of night too. Perfectly calm. That was what he chose to focus on instead of his own heartbreak.

The tie on his heart still tugged. The force of the pull still strong after all that he put them through. Maybe their heart ached just as bad as his did right now. He knew he shouldn’t have lied to them about his past but how were they supposed to fall in love with him if they knew what a monster he was? Were they just supposed to accept him as the murderer he was?

Mortals were so fickle. The longer he kept this secret from them the worse it would be to tell them when it finally came the time to tell them. If he told them as soon as he met them then they would have run away. How was he supposed to make that decision so quickly? Was he even supposed to make that decision? Were they supposed to make that decision for him?

The lake remained still for hours. Even when the sun came up and he was still standing at the window the lake was still. It would remain that way for hours, he hoped. The sun’s rays bouncing off of the water and into his eyes. But the stinging he felt wasn’t as bad as the ache still left in his heart. The wound all too fresh still.

“Brought you breakfast, Shakespeare, while the council decides your fate.”

Loki turned to Tony Stark and the builder of the prison he now sat in. He set the plate down on the desk that rested on the wall furthest from him. Waffles with a drizzle of syrup. Not as much as he would like but that didn’t matter. Still steaming but losing its heat. Tony closed the door behind him. If it weren’t for his own mistake Tony would have probably had left the door open to help him escape.

“And why aren’t you down there to help them decide if I should live or die?”

“Because I kind of understand where you’re coming from.” Tony rested a hand on the desk with a smile. “You know, when I first decided that I actually had fallen in love with Pepper, I didn’t know if I should tell her about my moonlighting as Iron Man. If I told her, her life would be at stake. If I didn’t tell her about what I did then she would be mad at me when I found out.”

“You’re not someone who lead an attack on New York that lead to hundreds of deaths.”

“But that wasn’t really you. Only the part of you that was needed by Thanos to carry out the plan. It’s not like you were fully there at the time of the crime. If this were brought to a court of law then you would be dragged off to an asylum.”

“I do believe they call them psychiatric wards now.” Loki poked back. “Even then, all I wanted to do was protect them.”

“And you made what you believed to be the right decision at the time.” Tony sighed. “Who is this person anyways? They must be special if you sneak out to go see them.”

“Their name is Y/N, Y/N L/N and they live in the cabin behind us they live with an-”

“Tony! We need you down here now!” Natasha’s voice carried up the stairs towards the both of them. “We’ve got a situation.”

Tony shut the door behind him. His feet pounding against the stairs as he rushed himself down to whatever the situation was. Loki’s heart tugged harder than it ever had before. His knees crashed into the wooden floor beneath him almost as if his heart was going to be pulled out of his chest. His eyes tilted up to the dimpled ceiling.

They’re here.

“Come on down,” Natasha placed her hand on Loki’s elbow and dragged him down the stairs. “You might want to see this.”

“I already know that they’re here. I can feel that they’re here.” Loki stumbled down the stairs with Natasha.

“You might want to see what happened to them.”

You sat on the couch. A duffle bag sat at your feet as well as a backpack propped open. A granola bar in their hands. They were ready to make an escape today. Fury sat fixing up a scratch on your shoulder. His hands careful not to wound you even further. Your wounds much worse than when Loki had left you the night before. Some looked self inflected but he wasn’t going to speculate on that. Instead, he focused on the fact that you were here.

“How did you get out?”

“He left for work this morning and I just took my bags and ran. I couldn’t take the double life ant more but I wasn’t going to leave without saying goodbye to you even if I was still a little mad at you.”

“Y/N,” Loki dropped to his knees in front of you. “I would never intentionally lie to you. I just wanted you to love me for me and not for the monster that I used to be. I can not be more sorry for what I did to you and for us.”

“I understand but that doesn’t make me less mad that you lied to me for so long that it ended up with a gun to my head.”

“You don’t have to forgive me at all but I hope I can offer you my sincerest apologies for causing you more harm than good.”

“You know, having you here could be good for your safety as well as Loki’s recovery from villainy.” Fury turned to Loki. “They told us about what happened to them and they can stay here no matter what.”

“We can try and repair the relationship we had before?” You offered.

“Yes, I would like that very much.”

The butterfly on your shoulder fluttered its wings for one final time before settling into your skin. A frozen reminder of the promise Loki had made to you only days earlier. His own butterfly settled into his skin. The pain he felt much less than his own heartbreak the previous night. The heartbreak that still lingered but at least the pain had finally begun to dull and for once, his blood ran warm.


End file.
